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His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees! His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and remaining strength and very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn."(I love this part) The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck."This one is compliments of kilocyclesExcuse meA man enters a hotel lobby. As he runs to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman and as he does, his elbow hits her breast.They are both quite startled. The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me."She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room. The women each had a broiled lobster tail, which Lottie had grilled outside. I, too, had a lobster tail, but mine was accompanied by an enormous steak, plus all the veggies, a baked potato and fresh rolls."Jill, please tell Lottie that I don't want to eat this much at every meal; I will turn into a blimp before your eyes. I never eat this way at home."After dinner, Jill ran Emma back into town to her friend's house while she did a little shopping and I lounged around in the media room watching the Cubs get walloped again. I didn't realize that anyone had returned until I wandered up toward my room and I could hear the water running in the shower as I passed the bathroom door. Another long shower, I thought as I walked past and entered my room. Not having my own bathroom was something that was going to take some getting used to, that was for certain. I did hear the bathroom door open about ten minutes later and shortly thereafter, I undressed to my shorts and headed that way. Emma's.
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